How To Handle Stress BOB POLK

1. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa.
2. Pop some popcorn without putting on the lid.
3. When someone says, "Have A Nice Day", tell them you have other plans.
4. Find out what a frog in the blender really looks like.
5. Make a list of things to do that you have already done.
6. Dance naked in front of your pets.
7. Put your toddler's clothes on him/her backwards and send him/her to preschool as if nothing was wrong.
8. Retaliate for tax woes by filling out your tax forms with Roman Numerals.
9. Tatoo "Out To Lunch" on your forehead.
10. Tape pictures of your boss on watermelons and launch them from high places.
11. Leaf through a National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives.
12. Buy a subscription to sleezoid weekly and send it to your boss's wife.
13. Pay your electric bill in pennies.
14. Drive to work in reverse.
15. Relax by mentally reflecting on your favorite episode of "The Flintstones" during an important finance meeting.
16. Sit naked on a shelled hard-boiled egg.
17. Refresh yourself: Put your tongue on a cold steel guardrail.
18. Tell your boss to blow it out his mule and let him figure it out.
19. Polish your car with earwax.
20. Read the dictionary upside down and look for secret messages.
21. Start a nasty rumour and see if you recognize it when it comes back to you.
22. Bill your doctor for the time spent in his waiting room.
23. Braid the hairs in each nostril.
24. Write a short story using alphabet soup.
25. Lie on your back, eat celery, using your navel as a salt dipper.
26. Stare at people through the tines of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
27. Make up a language and ask people for directions.
28. Replace the filling of a Twinkie with ketchup and put it back in its wrapper.
29. Jam minature marshmallows up your nose and see how many you can sneeze out at once.

Go to:

• Shauna's Stuff | David's Stuff | Yhsla's Stuff
• Clan Jones Web Page | Disclaimer | Production Notes
• Our kind and gracious Host ...